Probably one of the things which make me a sad person is, I didn’t know how to celebrate small wins.
The whole “Celebrate small wins” concept used to be so alien to me. It’s not new; but even if I knew of it, I didn’t really believe in it. Yes, I am in my quarterlife and this is almost the first time I considered it in a different life. Or maybe, it did introduce itself to me before, but I ignored due to my short-sightedness.
I have so many failures in my life. Basically, because I regard a lot of circumstances as failure. [Also read: Diluted Achievement, No Thanks.] My goals so far have always been grand—some are reasonable only in a perfect world. With grand goals come great efforts, and I often get tired and sick in the process of achieving them. Of course, they would fail.
I once attended a gratitude workshop which gave me a new and fresh perspective. I normally avoid optimistic stuff—the reason I went there was because I was trying to compensate for my depression. If my mental health was put to a linear scale, it would have been a big negative number. So, I had to intentionally do a big leap to brightness—really out of character—just to get myself back to the positive scale, even at zero or level one.
And, that was when someone told me, “It’s okay to set big dreams and learn the hard way. Everybody has their own way of disciplining themselves. But, don’t lose sight of the small things that make you happy every day.”
Maybe it was because of the weather on that specific day, or my mood when I heard it. But, even though it’s so cliché, that was the first time it made sense to me.
How pitiful, to have been looking at the world grandly, thinking that everything big is greater than just ‘many’ small stuff. Sometimes, it’s the small things that matter. Dust in the wind. Dirt in the eye. Microbes and parasites. Small things that rot you inside. Cool night breeze. Cute pens and sticky notes. Compliment you got this morning. Small things that encourages you to be alive.
It was a difficult transition, considering that I came from an overly pessimistic nature. But yeah, I started celebrating small wins.
Some of the small wins I started celebrating recently include:
waking up every day (I used to wish I never wake up anymore)
clocking in on time (I lost motivation to go to work)
accomplishing whatever is in my checklist (even if it’s just one item)
fulfilling skin care (I neglected my skin for a long time)
doing the laundry (such a chore but I know I should)
not working overtime (I have an obsession for overworking)
resting during weekends (I used to work all-week)
These are wins. Depression is a constant battle. It might be a forest of thorns surrounding me, which hurt me even in the slightest move. But, when I started to think that I can cut the branches one by one, slowly and carefully, instead of trying to shove them all off to one side and getting myself scratched by the thorns, it started to seem attainable, a little. Celebrating small wins. Overcoming small pieces of the problem. It’s just the same analogy.
I hope that for everyone who reads this, may you also find the light to see the small stuff worth being grateful for.
ความคิดเห็น